When Brian was 20 months old we saw him with my lipstick. The lipstick was all over his face and his pyjamas, and the lipstick tube was empty.
Before he was 3 years old I realised that this child was an iceberg waiting for Titanic.
Before the age of 10, he had broken his nose twice, right collar bone once, right arm once and dived into a swimming pool wall slicing his eyebrow open and needing 7 stitches.
The Doctor ordered a complete body xray to reassure himself that this was not an abused child. That was a real morale downer for a mother who had 3 older daughters, trying to juggle all these characters in the air, and I was definitely not even a second class juggler. There were some unavoidable breakages along the way.
As was his energy, his appetite was of monstrous proportions and as he grew older he was constantly looking for food. The bread bin was always full. Must be a regular factory in there, and the fridge was just part of the team.
As was his energy, his appetite was of monstrous proportions and as he grew older he was constantly looking for food. The bread bin was always full. Must be a regular factory in there, and the fridge was just part of the team.
He was gentle, kind, adored animals and wouldn't stand on a bug if he could help it.
Thus was his temperament and he took it with him into adulthood.
When he was 10 years old his father and I separated. For Brian the shock was total, the recognition complete. All our lives changed and we were at the lowest point in our lives so far. He had become a lost and confused child and didn't know where he belonged, and I could not help him, I had nothing to give. It has been a heavy cross to carry.
During his teens he rebelled against everything and everyone, there were parties and girls, he went through them like a bandit. I was permanently fearful for him. By now his sisters were married and had come to terms with much of this. Brian and I just had to figure things out as we went from day to day.
In his early 20's he met a girl, Louiza, who changed his life around, with her he found happiness and enjoyed life again. He chose wisely. She gave him the ultimate gift of a son, Nathan. who is 22 months old at the printing of this post.
Brians Dad was killed in a head on car collision with a drunken driver just six weeks before Nathan was born, so he never saw his grandson.
And enter Nathan.
Fishing with Dad at the dam outside Ermelo...
There was a time Brian's life could have taken a very different and tragic course, but I have learned that the traits with which we are born may become suppressed during the course of our lives, but are always there, and with the right support and love will reappear again and give life to strength, maturity and experience.
This has been a difficult post for me to write as I have had to live through a lot of the trauma of our broken lives again.
But this story has a great silver lining, don't you thing?
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