KRAZI KIDS PART lll - LISA

My bug eyed dummy sucker. That is how she was then, as a toddler living in Rhodesia, on a sugar estate in Triangle. Although she has now lost the bug eyes and the dummy she hasn't lost her rather wacky sense of humour! Although it can wears thin as she lives her life in Cape Town as a single mom holding down a demanding job.

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Lisa was 2 in this photo and her dummy, which was her new best friend from the time of her birth, was a fixture day and night and I wondered whether she would ever be friends with anyone or anything else. When she reached the age of 4 I thought I had better do something about it. I believed and still do, that a small child will give up their comforts when it was good a ready, as they will potty train more easily when they are ready to do so. I was one of THOSE. But by 4 and 6, a little encouragement did not harm!

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I would say "only at night" - or try and hide them altogether but I could never stand the heartbreaking sobs this caused and always caved very quickly. I started to have visions of her walking down the isle one day with her dummy pinned where her corsage should be.

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Then one day I thought I little psychology might do the trick without causing pain. I told her that I would buy her an extra large lunch box, for all the dummies as well as her sandwich. She was fine with that.

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1 failure to my name so far.

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But I did some more brainstorming and came up with THIS. I think I should have patented it for I truly had a lightbulb moment!

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I tied a dummy to her bed, not too long, just long enough to reach her mouth. "You can suck that thing all day, BUT you have to lie on your bed to do it. I think she just heard "all day" and thought she had worn me right DOWN ... ha ha, I LOVED letting them think they had won! It always made them so HAPPY, and a happy child has a happy mom!

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"ok" my little tot beamed in agreement. As the day progressed, this undersized, skinny little babe would race through the house, dive onto her bed, grab the dummy, have a few sucks, jumped up and was off outside again. It was actually quite a funny sight to witness, still brings back smiley moments when I look at the old photos.

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As the days wore on, and also as I predicted, the bedroom dashes decreased, maybe they were becoming more trouble than they were worth and she had to always stop what she was doing? Exhaustion took over? Her dummy became less and less important to her?

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And then one night I looked in on the sleeping children .... "whose strange child is that in the bed...? good grief! It's mine!" Dummyless no less.

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And just a small part of me felt a little sad that one of my children had taken another small step from babyhood on her journey into the difficult years that lay ahead before she would be one day be a mom of her own.

PRESSIES, BALLOONS, SWEETS AND GAMES

128. Yes, that is the official number of birthdays my children have had, combined that is, and the number of parties I have prepared, baked for and games I have organised during my childrens' growing up years. The tot in the picture above is Lisa, my third and youngest daughter on her 1st birthday in Salisbury, Rhodesia as it was known then.
Lisa sent me photos of HER daughter Natalia's 7th birthday party. They look as though they are well pleased with their efforts, don't they, lets look at a couple more...

Here is the cake, all about the sea and mermaids. Did you make this Lisa?
Here is the table all set to catch the eyes of excited children who are drawn to sparkling and edible things!

All these photos stirred my memory and she dragged me with her long fingers once again, out of my comfortable place in front the the computer and took me on a journey back into the past to another lifetime that seems so long ago and yet at the same time only yesterday.

Dad is appointed the job of blowing up the balloons, fathers are very good at this I discovered as they are normally full of hot air! (joke) Couldn't resist that one, sorry!

The little celebrity has chosen her cake from the "book of children's birthday cakes" and with my sleeves rolled up I attack it and pray that it will turn out to look just a little like the one in the photo. I always took a photo of the cakes, and look at them now and can't help but marvel at my genius! (another joke).

GAMES. Oh dear. What an exhausting task. We had pin the tail on the donkey, oranges and lemons, blind mans buff, musical chairs (a favourite always), ring 'o roses, this was grans favourite, she participated in all the games and kept order as well. The girls would wait for her to come and then they would all run out and leap on her at once! Many years later Brian did the same thing but I bet she was glad there was only one then!

THE MOMS mmmmmmmmmm. They had to be there as the children were very young.

THE DADS - well, no surprises there, they were all out the back with their beers and talking about their jobs, some things don't change.

Their dad was in the police force and all the children were the offspring of policemen, it was a very close community, were a clan to be sure. We did Moses and the children of Israel proud back then!

AT LAST it was 5pm and everyone started drifting of. There were always some die hards who would stay half the night, but that seemed to be the way of things in Rhodesia. Lunch braais would end at midnight after everyone had eaten every morsel of food that was left, danced all night to 60's and 70's music....it was great!!!

I took my little tribe of sticky, dirty and tired little girls to bath them. And the the best part. After they got their second wind and we were all on our own, they went through the presents one by one again, examining them all more closely, any new books, always a hit, would be the bedtime story for that night.

And as another party came to an end, I inspected the 'damage' to the house, but those were the times when I reflected back on the day, and the happiness many little children had had, and it lightened the chore by far!!!

DRAGONS, TEARS AND GENTLE HEARTS

"That is so sad," wept the small boy as tears ran down his cheeks, "sing it again."

So for the 3rd time that hour and almost every day for the past month, I picked up my guitar and launched into my rendition of "puff the magic dragon" - knowing it would bring distress once again to the small boy who was my son. But there was never any talking him out of it, he was adamant.

It was the last verse that did it. Tearfully my child told me how SAD (with great emphasis) that the little boy had grown up and the dragon had lost his best friend, as he did not need the little boy any more in his dreams. How the dragon must have missed his friend.

My small son had learned of loss, and he had learned to feel someone else's pain.

I knew then with my mothers heart that he would have his heart broken many times in his lifetime, and I would not be able to protect him against it. He was on his own. And he grew into a sensitive young man who asked for little but hurt much.

And I watched as the years went by as his gentle heart often bled for others, and for animals who were mistreated and, even insects that were stomped on. My eldest daughter, Shirley, invented "pet heaven" and to lessen the pain, that is where all our pets went. That helped. It even helped me sometimes with our make believe "pet heaven"!

I thought back to a story I told entitled "It's in the eyes" - where I observed that the eyes were truly the windows to the soul, and when looking into the eyes of pictures of my 4 children, I could see there the people they would become. And they became those people.

Now I remember personalities of little children before they learned to bluff, but were natural and knew to be no other way but themselves. I realised that in my humaness God was giving me a head start!

I knew who my children were going to be from their earliest days.

I just needed to pay attention.

AND THEN ALONG CAME NATHAN

My 7th grandchild and 2nd grandson came into the world at 3pm on Tuesday 15th June, 2010, weighing 3,5kgs, with a yell measuring 10 on the richter scale. (what a beautiful sound it was) I know this because Kerry, my second daughter and one of Nathan's aunts was ready and waiting to take photos (see above) and record the yells within 15 minutes of his birth with her phone! She played it for me over the phone I LOVE technology! He gave his mother a very long and hard run for her money, poor girl, nothing was as she had planned it and he was born by c section after 36 hours of labour. You in a hurry to do that again Louiza?! However, we have a good God and we have been so designed as mothers to quickly forget the bad and instantly love the little bundles that we are blessed with. Brian, my son and Nathan's dad could not take his eyes off him and I will always remember the pride in his voice when all he could say to me on the phone was "he's beautiful mom!"

Kerry was with them for both days and Brian was very grateful as he really needed the support when Louisa cried in pain and he was powerless to do anything about it.

They took him away and cleaned him up, and is he not gorgeous?

I scratched through my many many photos and found these of Nathan's dad. He was 3 days old in the top one. The second one is proud dad celebrating with his gran at 3am. You look great for 3am mom, I just love this picture!

Before Brian was born, I remember telling my gynae that I wanted an epidural. I wanted no part of an a la naturale birth. "No" came the reply, "this is your 4th so you should be an old hand at this." "I know" I said "that is exactly why I want an epidural! Didn't get it, I was cured, he was the last especially when I discovered that babies of the 80's did not come with volume controls and on/off buttons!

And the last picture? After work one day with food to prepare for the rest of the family, (this was the best part of have a late lamb) there was always someone who wanted to get to know him. In this case he is getting to know dad.

Brian and Louiza, may Nathan bring you many years of joy, it is humbling to know that this special child was given to you to take care of in every way, it is the most important job you will ever have.

It is awesome.

FATHERS DAY Hmmmmmmm....

Fathers day. There are 3 men who come to my mind.

I am 58 and am the owner of no less than 3 fathers. But I want you to see them as I do.

The first, which would be my PATERNAL father and not photogrphed here, was mostly an "idea" to my young mind. In fact he was an atrocious womanising man who had no qualms when it came to signing me away when I was 3 years old, once he discovered he would not have to pay my mom child support if I was someone else's kid. I met him once when I became an adult and felt no bond whatsoever with this man or my half brothers and sister. In fact, I decided my mom had been lucky to dodge THAT bullet. I had always wanted to satisfy myself though as to where some of my attributes had come from.

My mom married the man who was to become my ADOPTIVE father, and he is photographed above, younger than he is now! He is with my son Brian when he was a toddler. This man never treated me any different to the 2 daughters he and my mom had' 5 and 7 years after me. Not that I noticed anyway. He always seemed fair and I was secure. Thats a medal right there! I say this as I was really not an easy child to raise, and was way ahead of my time in imagination and doing that which was wrong and frowned upon. It guaranteed me a place in the minds of the residents of Thornhill's Airforce Married Quaters in Gwelo, Rhodesia for decades after I grew up (I kid you not).

He cared when I got low grades, brought home undesirable boyfriends, our constants fights about fashion "should it be below the knee or or below the pants", my plastered on make up and long fringe - it was the sixties after all - magical time for me that was.

He also gave me away on my wedding day to the man I was with for more than 30 years.

As happens in life, my mom and dad had problems of their own which manifested over time, and my mom married again, by this time I had 2 of my 4 children.

Above you will see my STEPFATHER with my mom. He was the one who became the grandfather to my 4 children and my sisters 2 children, and, how lucky can a man get, the greatgrandfather to my 7 grandchildren. He passed with flying colours! My children adore him and especially Tessni, JP, and Shanni (who call him grandpa too!) see them often as they live near one another. He has made them wooden puzzles which fascinate them, apart from having made desks and other things for my children before them.

I have known him almost as long as I knew my adoptive father as he too was in the Rhodesian Air Force and lived over the road from us at Thornhill's Married Quarters.

Now, fathers's day is upon us again, and it is time for me to reflect upon what these men have meant to me in my lifetime.

Who do you think are in my heart on this day? I will give you a hint.

It is not my PATERNAL father.

Take a bow Dad and Chris, for me, blood has not been thicker than water, you are to me what my own father never wanted to be.

THE TOOTH MOUSE IS COMING TO GET YOU!!!

My daughter Lisa, in Cape Town, sent me this picture of her daughter, Natalia, who is 6 and has started losing her teeth! Here she is even modeling them.

It reminded me of an incident that took place when my son Brian, all grown up now, was about 4 years old.

"Gran's here" the youngest of the gang yells as he glances through the window at the sound of a car coming up our driveway. We lived in Roodepoort at the time on a gold mine.

As was normal, gran had to listen to all 4 speaking at once and responding appropriately - it is a form of self defence mothers and grandmothers learn early.

Tea and biscuits were brought as was the norm, after which the children all drifted off in different directions.

Mom says to me conspiratorally "I have a present for Brian, I could not resist buying it". My mom LOVED giving the children little gifts, it was as exciting for her as it was for the children.

He was called, and ran up to us and Gran says "LOOK what I have got for YOU!" Delighted and expectant faces were mine to witness! A very puzzled look overtook Brian's as he inspected the small box gran had given him to inspect. It had a picture of a mouse on it - I could see him think "sorry gran, you got me now".

"IT IS FOR YOUR TEETH WHEN THEY START FALLING OUT!" declares gran "Isn't it too sweet? So the mouse will know where to find your teeth and he will take the tooth leaving you some money for it!"

Brian looked stricken.

His eyes had grown twice their size - he is speechless and does not thank gran for her gift. Gran looks a little deflated. She loves the children's faces when she gives them things, not happening this time.

I don't know what just happened.

For a week Brian was on the quiet side, he would ask to look at his mouse box a few times, would examine it closely and return it to me. He never wanted to keep it.

Then one day he looked at me and asked "mommy, when all my teeth fall out, I won't be able to chew, and the box is too SMALL for all my teeth!"

NOW I know what happened. Of all the children I know, and there are many, can I have the ONLY one who thinks all his teeth will fall out at once! No WONDER he looked stricken when given the box, it explained his anxiety attack that lasted a week!

I explained how it all happened, and he was very relieved, his worried little eyes cleared with relief and I had my little boy back!

Misunderstandings between parents and children? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!

Thank you Lisa for bringing back the memory, and Brian still has the "mouse box" - just explain to your son, Brian, that teeth only fall out one at a time!

MY TWO FAMILIES....MY TWO LIFE EXPERIENCES

I have written much of my daughters and my experiences mothering these imps throughout the years, what was often stressful and horrifying then is, in retrospect funny and the memories bring a smile to my face. I even laugh at times when recalling something which could have been brought back to mind by a song, smell, or picture.

I also have an only child.

God has a sense of humour - I know this, actually, He must have a terrific sense of humour! My only child crept up on me, and what a wonderful gift from God. As I was watching my daughters grow up, become independent and slowly move away from me, I was blessed with a boy child, and what I difference I found there to be between girls and boys! Brian was like 3 children rolled into one and anyone who has a bunch of them deserves a medal! This one child had me running as fast as the girls did - or it could be that I was older and not used to it anymore??

THEIR life experiences have been very different, and mine with them as well.

A bushel of children need to learn pretty young certain rules. In the girls case and during a war, they had to learn to obey without arguing, it could save their lives. Obedience in certain situations were deal breakers. Next, if we were to go out as a family for a meal they had to learn to sit through it so that everyone could enjoy the meal and the company. I was once told that I was too strict on them and told our host that if I was not strict we would not have been able to enjoy one another's company as we just had'

For Brian, his life was very different. He learned many thing from his older sisters, they definitely contributed to his knowledge of how the world works. Without realising it they taught him CONTROL. As soon as this baby cried he had 3 willing sisters in a race to get to him first. ADORATION. He had 3 playmates and someone was always at hand to relieve his boredom, boredom just wasn't on his radar.

The girls grew into beauties (we all have them hey?) and as usually happens, boys appeared, hundreds of them traipsing through the house, drinking all the coffee and guess what that meant for Brian - more people to play with his lego with him, his cars with him and some used to come to take him to the skateboard track.

But one day, he realised that he was not the adored baby brother any longer with undivided attention, at least not since all the boys had arrived. He knew he had POWER over people and became DEMANDING to the point that his sisters, when they wanted privacy with their friends had to PAY HIM OFF to get him out from behind the couch and spying on them, or worse still, joining in the conversation. You see, they had taught him EXTORTION.

Soon I had complaints from the sisters, I had spoiled him, they had never been allowed to do THAT, he ALWAYS got his own way etc etc. (who was it did the spoiling?) Yes, I did spoil him a bit, everything about his life and theirs was different. He stayed in our bed for a year to make feeding easier. Imagine 3 babies in my bed all groping my boobs, like a litter of kittens! GOOD GRIEF.

Not long after I weaned him I discovered that he had a fraction in his blood missing without which he would have surely died as a newborn had I formula fed him. The fraction that was missing was gammaglobulin and the only things that would boost his weak immune system came from breast milk or gammaglobulin injections. He was in hospital weeks after me weaning him and this set the pattern for his pre-school years.

He was and is fearless. Something else that was a cause of great concern. Pain is a sign of something being wrong, we all know that, but his pain threshhold was very high and nearly got me into a whole heap of trouble once. When he was 2 and a half he rolled off our low bed, and the screams of pain took me quite aback. I took him to the doctor who, after ascertaining that he could not lift his right arm, ordered xrays. Upon their return the doctor inspected them, and looking at me over his glassed asked"when did he break his colar bone" "He didn't" I replied. But upon inspecting the xray, even I could see the truth of it. "This break is 2 weeks old, it is already mending" he said. He filled in a form and gave it to me, "what is this?" I asked, "body xrays" came the blunt reply. HE THINKS I ABUSE MY CHILD my thoughts screamed at me. I was mortified. There was no other damage of course and the doctor said it was procedure. But it was then that we discovered that when Brian was sick, he was probably very VERY sick. By the age of 2 and a half he had broken his nose twice, colar bone once, at 6 his arm by falling from the top of a tree, and acquired 7 stitches by diving into a swimming pool wall. He never seemed to feel the injections, LOVED to watch in fact (morbid child). He was also swimming in the deepend of the pool with the men at the age of 3, not fear of water, he just used to jump in and basically taught himself!

Now, today, the girls are still close, but they all married and have children of their own, they do not know their brother as only mothers know each of her children. Brian does not know all his sisters.

His teen years were not as happy as his sisters, but I always believed in him and knew what he was capable of. Believe in your children, be their champion because if you have a good relationship with them they will not want to let you down so they will work hard for your approval. I am glad I did, and he did not disappoint me.

I weep as my late lamb stands on the threshold of parenthood himself. His baby boy is due any day. You deserve this joy Brian.

I believe that you can do this too.

DOUBLE TROUBLE AND LIFE MADE EASIER

"I am NEVER going shopping with you again!"

This from my loving mother and loving grandmother to her, at that time, 3 grandchildren. I did feel her pain, I really did, she probably thought that she had left all that behind only to find the whole circle start again when she became the owner of grandchildren!

I, on the other hand, felt like some company with someone who could speak properly and hold a knife and fork. This was going to be a fun mother/grandmother/granddaughters day out. What FUN!! No, it wasn't my imagination, my dear mom DID change colour there for a moment.!

SO...(mothers are patient and long suffering you know, so if I ever doubted it, it was at moments like these that all doubt was put aside, she knew what was coming, I was only a rookie).

We loaded all the kids up in the car. Kerry and Shirley in car seats - the seats of the day simply clipped over the back of the seat, Lisa in the pram, a large highly sprung pram, very grand but not very practical.

Kerry always tried to reach down with her legs to see if she would be able to stamp on Lisa. I would put the hood up and all the way to town Kerry would rhythmically bump her feet up and down on the pram hood, but at least Lisa would stay in once piece.

Trying to have a conversation with mom was nigh impossible as children have this antenai that hears what they shouldn't and does not hear what they should. When adults are on the phone for example, they are all counting teeth as we try and concentrate on our conversation and chase them away at the same time. In this case the moment I drew breath to speak, that was the signal to do whatever they could to be heard over us. It is the signal to kick the hood harder, someone would drop a bottle and shriek for its retrieval and the one in the pram to schreech in fear for this abominably noisy and disorganised world she has been born into. The performance is worthy of an Oscar nomination. No wonder Lisa copes so well with turmoil today!

We then find a parking lot, no parkades, those only came later when I was not in great need of them anymore. Alighting from a vehicle parked in a parking space is hazadous as children run blindly into the road, never for the pavement.

We get Shirley into her harness - yes, I know, dogs also use them, I was told often enough, with disapproving looks. Tied her to the pram, harnessed Kerry in the pushchair (don't say anything), my mom pushed them and I pushed Lisa in her huge hughly sprung pram once I had eased it out of the back seat without tearing the upholstery. It was a good quality pram because Kerry never did manage to mangle the hood and Lisa remained unscathed.

Mom and I looked at one another with loaded looks that said "whose idea was this". We go from shop to shop with our loud and demanding little enterage until the whole fun expedition becomes too much for all of us, we cut the shopping short (a common practice in those days) unloaded the car, put our little hells angels to sleep and sat down for a much needed cup of tea and, yes, a proper visit!.

A few days later, mom arrived at the door, she had with her a present for me. "I am never going shopping with you again - not ever, but this will make it easier for you!" It was a twin pushchair, seen above - she never had to come shopping with me again after that and we visited in the comfort of home, the best place to be with toddlers where they are happier anyway. They only enjoyed shopping many years later with me and my purse in tow!

I used the twin pram for 4 years. I became expert at pushing both prams an once without them colliding. In the photo Lisa (left) was 18 months and Kerry (right) was 2 and a half.

I gave the pram to a mother of 10 month old twin boys when we left the country, so it was put to very very good use.

To moms who have been there!

PORTRAIT OF MY MOTHER

"Gay, if I had known you were going to put THAT photo on your blog, I would have fixed my hair!" or "I look so OLD", Old? I ask myself, No mom, a work of art.

In that face I see a wonderful tapestry of a life lived to it's fullest - I see sunshine, rain falling, a breaking heart, a lifetime overflowing with memories of young and grown children. A grandmother to 6 grandchildren, almost 7 great grandchildren.

A loving, caring soul, involved in a multitude of things, a young mind. A tapestry I have the priviledge of being woven into and have known for 58 years. Unstoppable love for her children, she has passed on her wisdom and values to me, in turn I have passed them onto my children and they have passed them onto their children. This wise soul has helped shaped 3 generations of descendants. She has a brain full of information, even, in her own words "useless information!" (not so useless at times). I would love to pick that brain and find out what it was like for her to be a 6 year old girl at the outbreak of World War 2.

I wish I had appreciated her more. My understanding of what she as a mother was up against, what she feared for her children, only came to me years later when I became a mother. I am still learning to understand as she has a 19 year start on me! I never realised what a strong person she was until after the fact, there was nothing she could not fix.

When I was 5 months pregnant with my first child, now the mother of 2 young daughters herself, I clearly remember mom studying me for a long time, then with sternnes in her voice said "If you do not give that baby a proper routine, I shall take it away from you" In mom's eyes I suppose I was a child havining a child! I only understood how she felt many years later when that same baby had her first baby! I wondered if she would know what to do with it, what it would need and if they would have the stamina for all that would be asked of her as a mom.

Well, God in his wisdom has instilled a wonderful instinct in girl babies which lies dormant and kicks in wonderfully when they need it!

So mom, my beautiful work of art, I have printed, at the top, a lovely photo of you taken some years ago, your hair is just fine and you glow!

Beauty truly is on the inside, outer beauty is but a fleeting thing, but within, the mind, the heart and the soul, thats what counts!

REUNION!!!!

top left : Lisa, gran and Kerry
bottom photo: top, JP, Natalia, Tessni Bottom row: Brian and Louisa, Lisa, Kerry holding Shanni
Johan, Kerry's husband

The family missing is Shirley, Trevor, Vicky and Jessie, who live in Cape Town


From the time my children were very young I tried to instil in them a strong bond for one another. So often we grow up, marry, leave home, leaving too all the memories we had of our siblings during school days, dating, - we fought and loved together too.

Then guess what, we marry and do not see one another for another 25 years! We have no idea what kind of lives our sibilings have, the traumas they have had to face, knowing their children as they grew, and the closeness is gone from us and they have become cleaved (as it should be) to someone else and formed a new family with its own identity.

I hardly know my sister Ann in England other than what our mom tells me (thank goodness for her), she has no children but married recently to a wonderful man, and he must be wonderful if he has made her happy! A very picky young child she was and I guess she stayed that way!

Then there is Colleen, a little younger. I had more contact with her and did know her children for some time. But we visited one another mainly as we were the only 2 in the family who presented our mom with her only 2 grandsons within 5 months of one another! Colleen is now in Dubai as her husband is an engineer, and they have moved around the world most of their married lives. If it were not for MOM, I really wonder whether we would even by in touch today. Very, very sad, as we are blood and family is very important. There was a large age difference between myself and Ann and Colleen. I was in class 1 when Ann was born and they had this kind of click which did not include me, I felt it was my right to tease and torment them, especially Ann. I was the BOSS. When I married they were both in school still speaking their secret language, and when I had my first child, Shirley, they were STILL in school. So you see, they were close and still are, and I kind of float around out in space trying to remember them as we grew up! In my minds eye I see (don't laugh) myself and my mom in a bubble, Ann and Colleen and mom in another bubble, and a large bubble encompassing all of us. How strange the mind is.

I am sorry that we did not keep up for all those years, but since the internet and emailing is now available, and my daughter in Middleeburg introduced me to it, I am getting to know them, I receive pics from them, news, it is wonderful, I feel a part of their lives, and there are no more clicks!

I partly succeeded with my children. They too live far from one another, with 2 in Cape Town and 2 in Middleburg, so there is still a close connection. The girls are very close in age which has helped, having 3 teenage daughters in the home at one time was harrowing. We had an endless stream of boys, the coffee, sugar and milk disappeared before my very eyes too.

Then Brian came along some 11 years later, he was a gentle and kindhearted little boy, he had many friends so there were sleepovers etc.

They grew up and yes, you guessed it, 2 married and started families with its own essence, and the sisters grew away to a certain degree from the others. Lisa, who is the mother of Natalia, was married for a short while, but is now an excellent single mom, Natalia started school last week. See my last post! Brian and Louisa are presenting me with my 7th grandchild.

Now, if you will take a look at the photos at the top of the post, you will see something that I will not forget for the rest of my life. Lisa made a huge effort, stretched her finances, and went to visit her sibilings and her grandmother whom she has not seen for 10 years. I was probably more excited than they all were! She and her gran have not seen one another for 10 years, so gran has never seen this great grandchild (Natalia). Kerry, she has not seen Kerry for 10 years either.

So, the last time Lisa saw Kerry (and there is only l year between them) was when Tessni was l year old, she is 11 now. So she does not know JP, and certainly not 17 month old Shanni. Kerry in her turn has only seen photos of Natalia.

Lisa and Brian were always close over the years and he was 14 the last time she saw him, and did not recognise this tall hairy man who was her little brother!

I hope they do not leave it for another 10 years, that would be very sad, but now that the ball has started rolling, my prayer for you all is that you all go that extra mile to share old memories, and I know you have plenty! and give the coursins a chance to know one another.

Well done Lisa, brave girl to travel from Cape Town to Middleburg with a child.

That's the spirit!

GIANT STEP INTO A NEW ERA

Today was one of the biggest, most exciting milestones in my 6th granddaughter Natalia's young life.

She started BIG SCHOOL and was very excited, it was something new and it MUST be important as mom has spoken about how wonderful it will be for ages now. THEN there was that huge rush buying uniforms, including matching brooks, shoes and socks, and all that stationary. Can ANYTHING be more exciting then to embark on such an adventure when a girl is 6!

For mom.......she is devastated, her baby is taking a giant step into the world, and she has a lump in her throat the size of an apple, she is weepy and wonders if she will survive this ordeal. She did not sleep well the night before, tossing and turning, she wears dark glasses to hide the evidence of her ordeal.

Every minute of the day, until 12 noon her mind is nowhere else but in that classroom where she handed her child over to ANOTHER WOMAN. Will she understand her, be able to 'read' her as she herself can, will she have fun today and look forward to tomorrow or will mom have to drag her kicking and screaming? Each child reacts differently, every mom the same, with heavy hearts.

Natalia will be more tired than normal today as more is expected of her. This is not preschool where the rules are more flexible, but this is the first step into learning to integrate into society one day so that she may become a contributing citizen, and rounded adult.

However, I know ONE little girl who had it all figured out and had sized up the situation on her 1st day of school years before. I was called in by the teacher on THE FIRST DAY and was told that Lisa had thrown all her pencils, crayons and her sissors out of the window. She told us they 'fell out of the window'. Do you want to know what this imaginative 6 year old said when taken to task? "If I have no pencils or crayons, then I can't go back to school!"

Well, Natalia is a chip off the old block so I wonder how this day will end for her.

Lisa, I am feeling your anguish baby girl, but it gets better and can even be an exciting road for the 2 of you to travel along together, making plenty of memories along the way, so, take her by the hand and walk with her - you will be amazed at the blessings that come your way.

And it just keeps getting better.

...FOR THE TIMES THEY ARE A CHANGING...

I had to share these two photos with you. The first one is my mother holding Brian, my son when he was 4 days old.

The second, he is holding my mother 20 years later at the age of 24.

This is a beautiful illustration of how life changes, and who we become. Family is very importand. If you are blessed with a loving family, treasurer them and treat them well, caring for them and love them at all times, never taking them for granted.

I hope that my family does not think that I take them for granted, because I appreciate every little thing they do for me during these difficult times, and love them dearly for it.