As I have journeyed through life, I have planned continually in exactly the same way you have. ha ha.
Now those of you who are 40 upwards, think back to your teens and twenties, the dreams you had and the plans you made, either on your own or with your new husband. The world was your oyster, it is exciting, you move into your first flat, your own your first house, have your first child.
Staying in your 40's up, you will know by now that life throws you curved balls and we make wrong choices. As a result the wonderful life we foresaw never happened.
Many of us don't even have the same husband we made all those plans with. You may be in a bad financial position because of it, it you were sensible through you may have salveged some financial security for yourself if you are a woman. If not, hold on tight, your life is about to change course! It may be for the better - or not. So many ifs.....
After my marriage ended, I lost financial security and the world in which I found myself was a sink or swim world. There was an upside, I am stronger in the sense that I can cope with things I never thought myself capable of. I never feared much, to the frustration of my family, now I fear not at all, I have been there and survived. I have lived from time to time among people with no work skills, starving children (heartbreaking) abused children and wives, and yes, even a few abused men. It is best to harden you heart if you want to keep body and soul together.
My husband and I have even been offered a 'job'. Get this .... very well paid, we are told, involves travel, it is that of a courier. Which basically means you put your life on the line for the thriving drug lords by couriering drugs through 7 continents on a passport that is made for you, not in your name of course, and at the end of it all you will be R40 000.00 richer! Wow, what an offer! Everyone I know who has fallen into this trap is doing life in some foreign prison! I learned to be vigilent and circumspect.
My wrong choices toughened me up which is a good thing, but they also caused a whole bunch of problems and heartaches.
So we look back on our lives and wonder what happened. Can any of us pinpoint the moment when things started to go off course, that everything started to go a little crazy and instead of ending up where you imagined, you are on the other side of the track heading off into the unknown and wondering how you got there. It may build character of break us down, THAT choice is yours to make!
Young people, God has a very good plan for your life, it only goes awry if you try to plan it yourself without any sort of guidance because of all those darn choices to make!
I have tried to use negative experiences to grow, to face life head on, go through problems rather than round them, help someone less fortunate, there always is you know. I am less judgmental, more accepting, more appreciative of my family, learned to forgive, to be humble (a hard one).
To my mom, stepdad, and children, who, if they have judged me harshly I did not know about it but were there to pick up the pieces of my sometime shattered life, and with their help and love. They have been beside me during these troubled times since my husband had his stroke. Because of them and my new inner strength, the future doesn's look quite to bleak, so I say ..... bring it on, we CAN do this!
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